SpannerWorld

Hmm.. sums up my life

Read this is on bash.org

IRC is just mulitplayer notepad.

Haven't stopped laughing since.

2003 In Review

War in Iraq Parmalat Refugees New Labor Leader Australia's relationships in the world and the region Natural disasters Jacko Scandals SARS

If I could, I'd join Brian Moloko's haraam

I can't believe this... I'm off to see Placebo in Manchester on the 3rd of March!!

ME! The Spanner! Going to see the Sexiest Man on Earth (behind Andy) Even though I know Andy would have no objections to me calling Brian Moloko sexier than him.

Brian Moloko...

Mmmmmmm

Christmas gone mad? Or Santa Claus's evil influence?

Now, don't get me wrong. It's not that I 'don't' like christmas. Food, presents for me, few days off work; it's the hyperbole and superflous CRAP, which accompanies christmas that has me wanting to give Santa the world's biggest slap in the face. Okay, so I realise Santa may not be entirely true (sorry T, B will explain how all the adults have been lying to you in a shameless conspiracy based on the fact they think you are really dumb and needed the emotional crutch of Santa to get you through the horrible, cruel world in which we inhabit). I also don't believe in God, which means, my celebrating the birth of his only son, makes me a shameless tool of mass marketing culture and a drone of commercialisation. Right?

So the only Christmas carole I sing is an impersonation of a drag queen impersonating Liza Minelli singing 'Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer' and I did all my Christmas shopping today, Christmas Eve, only to buy a plant, some choclates, a top and a bottle of vodka. By the way.. vodka is the present which says 'I care' but not enough to care about your liver or social behaviour. Doesn't mean, whilst I'm sitting here, I'm not full of the Christmas spirit. (okay, so maybe it's brandy and coke.. maybe it's christmas spirit.. does there HAVE to be a difference?)

Therefore, I feel as though I am justified in claiming my part in the global conspiracy, which is Christmas. However, there is a but! There is always a but.... People can take Christmas just a little too far. Tonight, I dragged Andy, kicking and screaming away from the 120th re run of Diamonds Are Forever, to partake in the sickest of all Christmas traditions. Point and staring at those who have trimmed their houses with more than just a few descretely place fairly lights and tasteful traditional wreathes. NOOOO! Some people make their houses look as though Chevy Chases character from National Lampoons, wasn't even trying.

Here is an example.

MERRY CHRISTMAS ONE AND ALL!!!!!

Spooky...

I took the Myers Briggs test, which identifies 16 main personality types. After being brutally honest about my answers, here is what the 'test' told me I was like.

Profile one
This profile is freakishly accurate. When I finally answered all the q's truthfully, I knew I was onto something when I read this. The first two I tried, weren't quite me. Kinda close, but not quite. This one is pretty spot on. Maybe not the one I'd have wished for, which was one of the other two, but they were who I want to be, not who I am.

Profile two.
This second one is a bit more.. er, wanky. But it is still fairly valid. Although, other 'INFP's' include the Virgin Mary and a couple of disciples.... ah..?

Take the Myers Briggs test and let me know what you all come out with.

Myers Briggs Test

SCREW YOU ARSEHOLE!

FUCK YOU BITCH! Hang up on me? HA! How's this... I QUIT

ah, for those who don't understand this blog, please disregard... and have a nice day :)

And the Coalition are having trouble finding the causes for insurgency?

Ah, here's a tip guys... BEHIND YOU!

What's hot on DVD the Christmas in Iraq

Can we get on with it now?

Does the capture of Saddam mean we can now put all of our resources into rebuilding Iraq?

What the fuck?

Before you read this, you may want to check out a post by T trips blog

By banning tenders from France, Germany and Russia in Iraq, America is cutting of its own nose to spite its face. Many of the electircal, engineering and chemical infrastructure in Iraq 'pre-liberation' was French or German. France and Germany turned their back on the proposed invasion of Iraq, by 'The Coalition of the Willing' and many may feel, are now paying the price for not wanting to take part in the removal of the Hussien regime.

Rebuilding Iraq is the issue here. Not who did what to whom, or in this case, who didn't do what with whom. France have always behaved in the manner of a petulant child. Rich, well bred and smuggly superior. Australian's have no great love for the French, after their refusal to test Nuclear Weapons in the South Pacific in the mid 90's, treating Muaroa Atoll, like a shabby holiday shack they could visit, party hard, then leave in a complete mess as, well, the neighbours were only yokels and they didn't have to live there the rest of the year.

Germany, well, what is their boggle? No thank you. We'd rather not be involved in a war, and I think we're going to side with France! Okay, so I think I saw Satan buying ice skates the other day too, cause the rumour is HELL IS FREEZING OVER! When I work out their secret, freaky deal, I'm sure I'll let you know. Could it be a rebirth of Hilter's UFO program and a war with Iraq would have interupted their plans for universal domination? Was the Iraq to dusty? Did the impossibly ridged German's have trouble coming to terms with the idea of the fluid command structure of the British and American troops? We're they still all recovering from Oktoberfest? As for being confined in a tank with a bunch of Germans who have just consumed large amounts of saurkraut, cabbage and Germany beer, it's probably just as well for the Brits and Americans, the Germans decided to sit this one out.

Which brings me back to the rebuilding of Iraq. France and Germany are the countries they are today, due in part to the Marshall Plan. The interwining of the European economies has greatly benifited both countries and Western Nations in general. America relied on the growing European market in the 50's and 60's for its farming good, security needs and primary produce. Britain and America did not embark on the Marshall Plan out of humanitary goodwill or a feeling of obligation. It made good stratgic sense to increasingly combine the European markets into one and produce a comman security goal.

The threat of expansionist Russia loomed and 'Reds under the Beds' a growing concern for all 'right' minded Europeans and Americans. So where is the threat from Iraq? Here in lies a great problem. Chemical weapons? Hmm, still looking. Harboured terrorists? Well, even the United States have admitted most of the terrorist problems they are currently having are from 'foreign' agents. This only leaves regime change. Well, let's see. Yes, Saddam Hussein was a monster, yes, he deserved to go, yes, he killed, tortured and made the lives of ordinary Iraqi's hell. So hopefully we will see "coalition" forces in Zimbawee, Congo, Burma and Somali soon?

So, whilst I'm here holding my breath, this still leaves us with a situation in Iraq which is not only depressing, but horribly, horribly wrong. Okay, so France, Germany and Russia were COMPLETE pains before and during the Iraq invasion. But we have bigger issues to deal with now. Iraq needs infrustructre. Is it fair to punish the Iraqi people, buy banning tenders from these countires? If their tenders are unsuitable, so be it. But to completely disqualify them from the process is absurd. The Iraq people need assistance. Does it really matter France and Germany didn't want to play? Are Britain and the US going to continue to be petty?

There is no arguement, which is not completely colloquial, which justifies the exclusion of France, Germany and Russia from rebuilding Iraq. Okay, they were smart arsed wankers about the war, they bitched and whinged and wouldn't get their hands dirty. Is this enough to justify exluding groups who could help rebuild Iraq to becoming a modern, prosperous nation?

Where's my head at?

t -

Let's hope this all works and proves I am not totally technically incompetent. Because there are too many other examples of that....

G